Jacob was left alone; and a man wrestled with him until daybreak. When the man saw that he did not prevail against Jacob, he struck him on the hip socket; and Jacob's hip was put out of joint as he wrestled with him. Then he said, "Let me go, for the day is breaking." But Jacob said, "I will not let you go, unless you bless me." So he said to him, "What is your name?" And he said, "Jacob." Then the man said, "You shall no longer be called Jacob, but Israel, for you have striven with God and with humans, and have prevailed." Then Jacob asked him, "Please tell me your name." But he said, "Why is it that you ask my name?" And there he blessed him. So Jacob called the place Peniel, saying, "For I have seen God face to face, and yet my life is preserved." The sun rose upon him as he passed Peniel, limping because of his hip.   Genesis 32:24-31.
 
No shortage of battles all day long. There's traffic, the micro-managing boss, the demanding client, not to mention the daily parenthood battles of dinner, homework, bath and bedtime. As the sun slowly sets in the west, we begin to yearn for the peace that sleep will hopefully bring. My grandfather used to brag that he "slept like a baby" ...one of the benefits of "clean living and a clear conscience". But for many, like Jacob, sleep doesn't always descend like a soft, dark blanket of comfort and rest. Yes, for many, the battles of the night are quite different from those of the daylight hours. In the wee small hours, the creepy little demons of the past crawl out from under the bed and dance with the fears and vulnerability of the present, while the worries about the future circle the wagons. Loneliness is magnified at night. The ghosts of broken relationships hover over the bed. The failures of the day won't let us go and tomorrow morning's big presentation (or pending layoff) has us by the throat. "To sleep, perchance to dream-ay, there's the rub," Hamlet said. And for many, the nightmares are worse than the insomnia.
 
In many ways, Jacob earned his insomnia and the morning will bring long estranged twin brothers face to face for either reconciliation or perhaps death. Jacob wrestles all night long with some kind of divine adversary, often depicted by artists as an angel, but in the dark, who can say for sure? We know that God is present in the struggle, as He is in all our struggles. With the emphasis on Jacob being all alone, perhaps his biggest battle is with his own conscience. A much younger Jacob, thinking he was pretty slick, ripped Esau's birthright and blessing right out from under him, and then ran far away. He knows it was wrong. He's known it all these years, with every setting sun, and he's not feeling too slick at the moment. He is yearning to rise to be the man God has summoned him to be, but everyday in the bathroom mirror, he sees a fraud and a cheat. And so he wrestles throughout the night and holds his own with God, even when struck, until he receives that blessing he so desperately wants. He limps away a changed man, a new creation with a new name and a future shaped by God's blessing. And there is a happy ending for him-reconciliation with his brother. The Bible doesn't say so, but I'm betting he slept like a baby the next night.
 
This story could have happened anytime, anyplace - in the depths of a dark Chilean mine or in our own bedroom. We wrestle in the dark with God, and when we persist, holding on for dear life, we emerge a new creation in the morning light.

Lord, When we wrestle with our conscience (and with you) in the wee small hours, grant us Jacob's persistence to hold on tight until you shape us and sharpen our faith for the challenges ahead. Amen.

Contributed by Linda
Sunday October 24, 2010
Liturgical Year C Week 48
Sunday Gospel reading:
Lectionary 30 (Proper 25)
Twenty-second Sunday after Pentecost